--- title: "The first weekend at Dad's: a checklist" published: "2026-10-15" updated: "2026-10-15" author: "Dad Field Manual editors (drafted with AI help)" time: "2 hours to set up" cost: "About $30" ages: "2 to 12" where: "A house, an apartment or a room with a pull-out couch. A corner that's clearly theirs is enough." topics: ["co-parenting"] print: "https://dadfieldmanual.com/print?p=first-weekend-at-dads" url: "https://dadfieldmanual.com/plans/first-weekend-at-dads/" --- # The first weekend at Dad's: a checklist > The first weekend at a new place is mostly about small, ordinary things being ready. Set up their space with them, stock the basics, keep the plan light and know what you'll do if the first night is rough, so the place starts to feel like theirs. ## What you need - Sheets and a pillowcase or blanket they help pick (have / $15) - Toothbrush, pajamas and two outfits per kid that stay at your place (have / $15) - Anti-tip anchors for dressers, bookcases and the TV ($10) - A night-light, plus their comfort item if they have one (have / $5) - Breakfast, snacks and one easy dinner they already like (have) - The printed checklist, to tick off before they arrive (free) ## Before they arrive - **Anchor furniture and TVs.** Dressers, bookcases and TVs can tip onto a climbing kid. AAP says anti-tip devices cost about $5 to $25 and take minutes to install. - **Lock up medicines.** Keep them in their original packages, locked up and out of reach, and save Poison Help (1-800-222-1222) in your phone. - **Follow your court order or parenting plan.** Its times and rules come first; ask a family-law attorney before changing anything. If anyone is ever in danger, call 911. ## Steps 1. **Set up their space with them** (Together) If you can, let them help on the first afternoon: pick a pillowcase or blanket, choose a drawing or poster for the wall, and decide where the night-light goes. A corner works if it has their bed, their bin and one thing they chose. Say, "This is your spot. You get to decide how it looks." 2. **Stock the basics before Friday** (Dad) Toothbrush, toothpaste, hairbrush, pajamas, underwear, socks, two outfits each, a towel and weather gear. Food for breakfast, snacks and one easy dinner they like. Ask your co-parent, by message: "What are they eating these days, and what time is bedtime?" Michigan's court guide encourages parents to share routines and food preferences. 3. **Keep the plan light** (Together) Plan one small thing each day and leave the rest open: the park, a library trip, a board game, pancakes on Saturday. Kids need time to look around and get used to a new place. Save the big outing for another weekend. 4. **Keep the times they know** (Dad) Meals, bath and bedtime close to the times they're used to. AAP advises regular times for meals and bedtime so kids know what to expect, and the same basic rules in both homes. Put the bedtime steps on a sticky note by their bed. 5. **Plan for a rough first night** (Dad) A new room looks and sounds different. Leave the night-light on, keep the comfort item in bed, and tell them where you'll be: "I'm right in the next room. You can come get me." If they're scared, sit in the doorway until they settle, then a little less each night. Michigan's guide says night fears are common in young kids, and a favorite stuffed animal or familiar object can help with the switch between homes. 6. **Make missing the other house okay** (Dad) If they miss the other house, say so for them: "You miss the other house. That makes sense." (Use whatever your kid calls it.) If your parenting plan allows calls, let them make a short goodnight call. Don't ask questions about the other house. 7. **Pack up and note what's missing** (Together) On the last day, pack their bag together and write down what you were missing: a hairbrush, a favorite cereal, a second blanket. Get those before next time, so each visit feels a little more like home. ## If it stalls - If they say "This isn't my house," don't argue. Say, "It's new. It'll feel more like yours each time," and let them add one more thing they picked. - If they won't eat what you made, offer the plain version: bread, fruit, cereal. The first weekend isn't the time for a dinner standoff. - If they wake up upset in the night, keep the lights low and your voice quiet, and walk them back to bed. A rough first night doesn't mean the weekend failed. - If there's no spare bedroom, a curtain, a sleeping bag on a real pad and a bin of their own still say "you live here too." ## Variations - **Ages 2–4:** Keep the plan tiny: one outing, lots of home time. Bring the comfort item from the other house if it travels, and use the same bedtime song every night. - **Ages 5–8:** Let them choose the wall art and the first-weekend dinner. A picture checklist of the bedtime steps helps them do it themselves. - **Ages 9–12:** Give them real say over their space and some privacy: a door that closes or a curtain, a charger by the bed and a spot for their things that you don't move. **Not legal advice.** For custody, child support or parenting schedules, talk to a family-law attorney. ## Sources - **Anchor furniture and TVs.** AAP says furniture and TV tip-overs can cause serious injury and death, that young children often climb furniture, and advises anchoring furniture to the wall with anti-tip devices, which cost $5 to $25 and take minutes to install. (checked 2026-10-15) - **Store medicines locked up; Poison Help.** AAP advises storing prescription and over-the-counter medicines and supplements in their original packages in locked cabinets or containers, out of children's reach, and lists Poison Help at 1-800-222-1222. (checked 2026-10-15) - **Regular meals and bedtimes; the same rules in both homes.** AAP advises keeping a child's routine as unchanged as possible, scheduling meals, chores and bedtime at regular times so the child knows what to expect, and agreeing on consistent rules for both households. (checked 2026-10-15) - **Share routines; comfort objects; night fears.** Michigan's parenting time guideline says parents should share information about routines and food preferences, that night fears are common in young children, and that a young child struggling with transitions may benefit from predictable schedules and a favorite animal or other familiar object. It also encourages regular calls between the child and the other parent. (checked 2026-10-15)