Stay close on your off week

01What you need

• Your phone or a tablet for video callsHave
• A shared calendar with their games, concerts and school eventsFree
• A card game or coloring page you both have, for younger kidsHave
• The printed card, to tick off calls and eventsFree

Where: Calls and texts from wherever you are; events wherever they happen.

02Steps

1. Propose set call times

   YouAsk your co-parent for one or two set times a week that fit the other house's evening: "Would Tuesday and Thursday at 7:15 work for a short call with the kids? Happy to move it around dinner and homework." Michigan's court guide suggests standard, consistent times built around the child's routine and activities.

2. Keep calls short and about them

   DadTen minutes is plenty. Ask about one thing you know is happening: "How did the spelling test go?" Then let them lead. Michigan's guide says not to use these calls to ask about the other parent or to handle parenting issues; keep the focus on your kid.

3. Do something together on the call

   TogetherYounger kids talk more when there's something to do: Simon Says, Would You Rather, the same coloring page, or a snack at the same time. Ohio's court guide suggests games and shared activities like these to make video chats more engaging.

4. Send small texts

   DadIf they have a phone, send one short text now and then: "Good luck at practice." "Saw this dog and thought of you." No questions to answer and no pressure to reply.

5. Show up at their events

   DadPut games, concerts and school events on your calendar, go and cheer. Afterward, a short hello and a hug, a polite nod to your co-parent, and let your kid leave with the other house; it's their time. Michigan's guide says parents shouldn't interfere with each other's part in the child's activities unless a court order says otherwise, and Ohio's says attending activities is a strong way to stay involved, especially with teens.

6. End every call the same way

   DadPick a closing line and keep it: "Love you. See you Friday." Naming the next day you'll see them gives them something to count on. Then keep your promises; AAP says it's very important to live up to promises to visit or spend time with your child.

03If it stalls

• If calls keep getting missed, don't make it your kid's fault. Message your co-parent: "Is there a better time for calls this week?"
• If your kid doesn't want to talk, keep it to a one-minute hello: "Just wanted to hear your voice. Love you." Short counts.
• If they get upset on a call, stay calm: "You miss me, and I miss you too. I'll see you Friday." Ohio's court guide says to reassure kids it's okay to miss the other parent.
• If the other house takes away a device as a consequence, don't argue about it with your kid. Ask your co-parent for another way to reach them; Ohio's guide suggests exactly that.

04Variations

05Sources

• Set, consistent call times focused on the child. Michigan's parenting time guideline suggests building virtual parenting time around the child's routine at standard, consistent times, says the parent who is physically present should encourage younger children to engage, and says calls should not be used to ask about the other parent or communicate parenting issues. It says parents shouldn't interfere with each other's participation in the child's activities unless a court order prohibits it. Michigan Supreme Court, State Court Administrative Office Checked Oct 15, 2026
• Video-chat games; okay to miss a parent; attend activities. Ohio's guide suggests games like Simon Says and Would You Rather and shared activities to make video chats engaging, says to reassure children it's okay to miss the other parent, and says a parent who withholds a device as discipline should give another way to contact the other parent. It notes both parents can increase contact with teens by attending their activities, and encourages consistent electronics rules in both homes. Supreme Court of Ohio Checked Oct 15, 2026
• Keep your promises to spend time. AAP says it is very important to live up to your promises to visit or spend time with your child, and that a routine weekly or monthly schedule may be comforting. American Academy of Pediatrics (HealthyChildren.org) Checked Oct 15, 2026
• Go out of your way to stay included. AAP says phone calls, video chatting and messages can keep parents and children close, and that for children to rebound from divorce it is vital they know their parents will go out of their way to include them in their lives as fully and often as possible. American Academy of Pediatrics (HealthyChildren.org) Checked Oct 15, 2026

Where the idea came from: a suggestion in a r/coparenting thread, put in our own words. The facts above come from the sources listed, not the thread.